again..

Trying to arrange my thoughts lately
all my ideas contradicts and really don't know what is my final goal
Do i love or do i lust.
Another reunion of he and I, another uneasy nights for me
It is not love nor guilt that I feel, it is a weird competition that we have
I wish to present that I am not nothing without you
That I will have work love and friends my life after you
But I stil feel like I have not match up to you
I still feel like my life seems shitty without you
I admit that it was everything that i dreamt of
and as the text i sent you before we break up. it is a fairy tale that does not belong to me
Maybe i felt it was too easy, maybe i want to work on my life with my own efforts
therefore i left you, i had to feel like i belong to myself, not borrowing my perfect life from you
But I am happy, but unhappy after I have to compare myself with you
maybe it is a good idea that we shall never meet again